A prayer journal by Flannery O'Connor

By Flannery O'Connor

"I wish to write a gorgeous prayer," writes the younger Flannery O'Connor during this deeply religious magazine, lately stumbled on between her papers in Georgia. "There is an entire brilliant international round me that I could be in a position to flip in your praise." Written among 1946 and 1947 whereas O'Connor used to be a scholar faraway from domestic on the college of Iowa, A Prayer magazine is a unprecedented portal into the inner lifetime of the nice author. not just does it map O'Connor's singular courting with the divine, however it indicates how entwined her literary hope was once along with her longing for God. "I needs to write down that i'm to be an artist. no longer within the feel of aesthetic frippery yet within the experience of aesthetic craftsmanship; in a different way i'll consider my loneliness continuously . . . i don't are looking to be lonely all my existence yet humans simply make us lonelier via reminding us of God. pricey God please support me to be an artist, please allow it result in You."

O'Connor couldn't be extra simple approximately her literary ambition: "Please support me pricey God to be a superb author and to get anything else accepted," she writes. but she struggles with any hint of self-regard: "Don't allow me ever imagine, pricey God, that i used to be whatever however the device to your story."

As W. A. periods, who knew O'Connor, writes in his creation, it used to be no twist of fate that she all started writing the tales that may develop into her first novel, Wise Blood, throughout the years whilst she wrote those singularly resourceful Christian meditations. together with a facsimile of the complete magazine in O'Connor's personal hand, A Prayer Journal is the list of a super younger woman's coming-of-age, a cry from the center for romance, grace, and art.

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A prayer journal

"I wish to write a gorgeous prayer," writes the younger Flannery O'Connor during this deeply non secular magazine, lately came upon between her papers in Georgia. "There is an entire brilliant international round me that I might be capable of flip in your compliment. " Written among 1946 and 1947 whereas O'Connor was once a scholar faraway from domestic on the college of Iowa, A Prayer magazine is a unprecedented portal into the internal lifetime of the good author.

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The arguments might not sound so good to someone with a better mind; but my mental trappings are as they are, and I am always on the brink of assenting—it is almost a subconscious assent. Now how am I to remain faithful without cowardice when these conditions influence me like they do. I can’t read the particular depths of myself that say something about this. There is something down there that is feeling—it is under the subconscious assent—in a certain way about this. It may be that which is holding me in.

Maybe I’m mediocre. I’d rather be less. I’d rather be nothing. An imbecile. Yet this is wrong. Mediocrity, if that is my scourge, is something I’ll have to submit to. If that is my scourge. If I ever find out will be time to submit. I will have to have a good many opinions. 1/25/47 The majesty of my thoughts this evening! Do all these things read alike as they seem to? They all send a faint nausea thru me—albeit they were sincere at the time & I recant none of my articles of faith. This evening I picture theoretically myself at 70 saying it’s done, it’s finished, it’s what it is, & being no nearer than I am.

Oh Lord please make this dead desire living, living in life, living as it will probably have to live in suffering. I feel too mediocre now to suffer. If suffering came to me I would not even recognize it. Lord keep me. Mother help me. ] It is certainly His provision for all mediocre souls—a tool for us; for Bloy’s statue it is—how to call it? God on earth? God as nearly as we can get to Him on earth. I wish only that I were one of the strong. If I were that less would have been given me and I would have felt a great want, felt it and struggled to consummate it, come to grips with Christ as it were.

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